<aside> 👍🏽 Status: Real (sort of)
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Areas J, K, L, and so forth are tongue-in-cheek references to non-existent places—often used by military NCOs, as inside jokes during low-level hazing of new guys; basically getting them to run pointless errands. It’s not a universal thing at all, but is very common within Army combat units.
<aside> 💡 Example Usage: from Sergeant “Bart” Owns, Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri
</aside>
“You there—fuck face. Go to the motor pool and get the keys to area J from Sergeant Jones.”
As a new guy, similar to being ordered to find the keys to Area J, you might be instructed to locate equipment that doesn’t exist (eg: go get a gallon of blackout fluid from the motor pool) or to perform a task that would waste several hours of time (eg: deflate all the winter air out of that humvee, and replace it with summer air).
<aside> 😜 Status: Fake
</aside>
Bolded items are the departments mentioned or alluded to in the story.